Whao! Its terrible to be back to blogging.I almost forgot what's a blog...he he... Ann now when I am here,some time for confessions. Yeah,I am a serious despo. Now thats not my fault- look, I am 20(uhhh....19!),basically good-natured,not bad looking,in a good college...but still single and you won't beleive it(neither do I) havent had a single girlfriend till date. Had many crushes,some which lasted years and some lasted minutes. Let me recount those...what you not interested??? whats the f-word!
The crushes are in chronological order.(Names have been changed)
Crush no-1:I still remember that day(I mean that's to tell...now come on,you expecting me to remember the date???).I was then in Std.5...yes u read it correct. It was the recess time. I had finished eating and then suddenly my friend,Deepak asked me-"Do you like a girl?" I was shocked to hear that.This was my first encounter to "that" thing. Never before had I thought like that.I answered-"No one." I thought he would insist but he didnt.He must have thought that I must have been a newbie in the area-and that was true! I brooded over that for quite a few days and my hormones started running wild-I still remember those days. One day in the class from the blue,I noticed Priya I remember it was the Science class)...she was sitting leg over leg(the way girls sit).Her skirt was not in a "very-good" position and her legs(I mean the part of legs which normally isnt) was visible. I felt something and there went the first crush-Priya! I never told her but eventually she came to know and refused-my god!! was that refusal??? The crush didnt last after the refusal and till then it was nearly an year old...not a bad start.A year's continuation was good.
Crush no-2: Her name was Gayatri.This wasnt any eventful.I coudnt realise when and how it happened and never acknowleged it. But it happened. Somewhere around std.8! Lets see the next one.
Crush no-3: Now I am a youngster!I should have a girlfriend...I had thought. Class 11!The ripe time for "things" to happen. I was desperately looking for someone. There she was. Dressed in a black skirt and a red top on which was written "Bebe" in glittering letters. She looked amazing. I had to impress her. I was one of the boys whom everyone had known as just too smart at studies and someone as highly intelligent. No one had thought I could like a girl from out junior college... they thought my expectations were much higher. And so while my friends went around with girls I was left alone. I remember that feeling...uh,why had I to be so smart? But here she was. Her name was Shilpa(I christened her Pari). And within a day, everybody of our section came to know about this. Some exclaimed-What!Siddharth!Girl!Here!!! And whats more-the name Pari became popular as became the girl. I didnt tell her. And after some days her part was over.Maybe 2 weeks. After some days,some friends-who knew her well- told me that she is eyeing.I dismissed the matter. Huh!IIT preparation!
Crush no-4: I was in Kota...have become a complete nerd...nothing apart from studying. And no girls in my batch. After the re-tests my batch was changed from Y2 to X9. It was the month of December. I reached Bansal classes,collected the study material for the day and lined up for waiting to get into the class. Someone passed by. Just for curiousity I turned back. A girl dressed in a rough jeans,a red woolen jacket and a pink mufler.Damn the cold was pinching. She removed her mufler from her face.And I saw her.Oh my god...I couldnt beleive it.She was from my batch.I had seen her before but never seen her.She looked amazing.I didnt know her name. That day,and the day following,and the day following,I sat behind her trying to strike a conversation but failed. Eventually with all the study-pressure I forgot her within a week...but I must say...she was quite a damsel.I feel sorry to lose her.Only remembrance...Vibhuti!
Crush no-5: I was at my brother's place in Delhi. It was May after my IIT and AIEEE exams. Gayatri reappeared in scence. Though we had regular contacts there was nothing between us in particular. Everything was cumulating,I suppose! I won't call this a crush...it was,yes love! I realised it sometime. Had decided to tell her once I get back to my homeplace. But before that she told me she had a boyfriend and there finished my story! The loss was enchanced by my failure at IIT-JEE. The two biggest failures of my life-I call that. I thought of her for the next 1 year as still refresh and then masked it with my false pretentions that "I am so jolly". I still have a soft corner for her and still feel sad when I am writing about her. But I will never ever happen that love to surface.Its buried deep inside...it;ll never out.Gayatri,it will never come out.
Crush no-6: It was my first day in NIT Rourkela.Physics lab.Though heart-brokean after the Gayatri incident but boys will be boys. There she was. Rima.In a suit,trying to decipher what the f-word is the lab about. I was flat at her first sight. But too much competition!!! I lost and there was also the broken heart. Some 3 weeks.
Crush no-7: It was 2nd semester.January.I dont know-but winters make girls more beautiful. Rima again! Dressed in red(a little gliterring) sweater there she stood infront of the department. Flat again.Same story again.Dismissed it.Lack of ability.Some 3 weeks again.
Crush no-8: 3rd semester.Red suit.Sleveless. Flawless skin. Same story.Same girl.Rima-you are just too much.
Crush no-9: Yes,you guessed it right.4th semester.Same story.Same girl.
End of story!
Of all that has happened,Gayatri will be the eternal one.I consider that to be my firt love.Lost! B
But but but...in a month 5th semester.And you never know,maybe this time.Rima are you listening???
